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Pineapple…wtf?

Okay, alright…I know…who doesn’t love pineapple?  (probably only those actually allergic to the stuff)  I know I love it.  But what the hell?  It’s not from a pine tree…it’s not an apple…

This reminds of me something else…Grapenuts cereal!  It ain’t grapes and it ain’t nuts…wtf is it?  Ya, ya…look at the ingredients you say, but what I want to know is what exactly inspired the name!!!  Why Grape Nuts?!?  Because they look like little tiny mouse turds.  I suppose “Post Mouse-Turds Cereal” just wouldn’t sell as well, lol. 

I happen to think that aLOT of product names are created in the middle of something I like to call a caffeine-induced-creative-frenzy.  Usually happens after the 14th cup of joe served at the local greasy spoon (somewhere around 2am)…i.e. Denny’s or Shari’s (that’d be Denny’s sister’s place) or maybe even the local IHOP (the International House of Pancakes where you will be hard pressed to find anything international other than the pre-fab “crepes” drowning in slightly thawed strawberry jam and imitation whipping creme). 

You see, when you hit that 14th cup of coffee…you sort of…enter a zen-like state of altered consciousness.  Everything becomes frighteningly clear and all of a sudden, you have the working formula for Cold-Fusion scribbled across five napkins.  It’s weird.  Of course, the hangover from such a rush is really unenviable, lmao!!  Feels a bit like being hit head on by a Mack Truck with a surreal just-been-to-the-llibrary kind of feeling attached…somehow…sort of.  Very odd.

Anyway…no particular point here…just reflecting on weird names.  Pineapple.  Grapenuts.  Guess I just don’t get it.  D’ya think it might make any more sense if they decided to make Pineapple Grapenuts? 

Why not?!  They’ve already got 11 different kinds of Cheerios.  I’d kinda like to see pineapple represented in the cereal world…somewhere.

Categories: Random
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