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Dear John letter to Starbucks:

August 19, 2009 2 comments

Starbucks…we’ve had a good run, you and I.  You were there for me in my ignorant youth and I gave you so much of my money.  You comforted me with your big easy chairs and your cookie-cutter jazz sounds when I thought I needed to feel snobby, when I craved to be just a little bit snooty.  You fed my vanity to my detriment, or so I thought. What you really did was, keep me blind to what a REAL coffee should be.

I know, I know…you say you are reliable and are always with me no matter what city I find myself in…and this is true.  However, I’m afraid I have outgrown you.  You insist on staying the same old you.  You are so last century with your overly roasted, dried up nasty beans.  The only thing you’re still good for is your orange/cranberry scones, but that isn’t enough for me anymore, no…sadly, this is farewell.  Farewell to you Starbucks,  the McDonald’s of the coffee world, my eyes have forever been opened.  It is truly sad that it has taken me this long to find out what REAL coffee is supposed to taste like.  Good, however, that I didn’t have to actually travel to Sumatra’s Gayo Mountain region to find it.

Starbucks…meet my new coffee:

Wandering Goat Coffee Company (clearly in honor of the The Kaldi Coffee legend).

I had a cup of their wonderful brew at a fabulous little desert bar called Nib (a little restaurant that is still SO new to the local scene that they don’t even have a website yet…but let me tell you…FABULOUS!!!). It was presented to me French pressed and was so rich and smooth…I didn’t even need half and half. !!! I AWAYS NEED HALF AND HALF IN MY COFFEE (or so YOU said…LIAR)!!! It was everything I ever dreamed coffee could be…AND THEN SOME!  The best coffee I’ve ever had.

The truth is you wanted me to love you, but you never loved me.  You took, took, took and never gave me anything beyond a false sense of society and a plasticized vision of classiness.   I won’t weep for you though, no…you still have the blind masses devoted to your two-tailed mermaid logo, two-tailed like the two-faced coffee you turned out to be.  I wasted the best coffee drinking years of my life on you!!!

Starbucks, I think if we’re honest with each other, we will see that you won’t miss me, and I certainly won’t miss you.  Maybe if I find myself stranded in a strange city I’ll pop in for a bit.  Or, maybe I’d rather drink pond scum.  It wouldn’t be that much different…now that I understand what I’ve been missing, lo, these many years. LMAO!!!!

Ciao’!

This is my kind of revisionist history…

April 30, 2009 2 comments

A friend of mine has finally gone public with her exquisite jewelry creations!  This isn’t your ordinary beadwork…it has history!

“My jewelry is inspired from all of my travels looking for unique relic pieces….old pearls, antique rhinestones, vintage charms, precious religious pieces and mixing them with new handmade antiqued sterling silver wire and silver soldered elements to create a new relic for someone to treasure.”

And of “Miss Sally”, the piece pictured  above, she says:

“Miss Sally is a German doll unearthed in the old china doll factories of Thuringia. She has ‘birdcage’ skirt fashioned out of sterling silver wire. Inside her ‘birdcage’ hangs a little sterling bird charm and topped off with a vintage mercury glass turquoise bead.

Miss Sally hangs from a vintage turquoise and clear rhinestone crown. The necklace is made of sterling silver hand linked vintage turquoise mercury glass beads and old Japanese glass beads. The Japanese glass beads have a beautiful luster and a than vintage antique look that only these type of glass beads have when some of their luster coating has escaped.”

There is something utterly charming about taking an old piece of porcelain or stone/bead and re-visioning it into a beautiful piece of wearable art.  Recycling at it’s very best and most glamorous!  And each piece is totally unique.

Having had the privilege of visiting Cheryl’s jewelry studio, I can tell you it is brimming with nothing less than the most fabulous works in progress…I can’t wait to see what else she designs. It won’t be long before I can add some of her pieces to my own jewelry case.

You can visit her Esty shop directly here:  Inspired Relics, and also her main site, The Art of Nothing.

Categories: Favorites

And so ends an ERa.

April 2, 2009 Leave a comment

Goodbye ER.  Thanks for the ups.  Thanks for the downs.  Thanks for the memories.

Categories: Favorites

They’re remaking “Footloose”?!?

April 2, 2009 4 comments

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

A remake to the 1984 Kevin Bacon-starring film, “Footloose”, has been set to be directed by Kenny Ortega, the helmer of Disney’s “High SchoolMusical” series. It is expected to start its principal photography in Atlanta sometime this spring with a budget over $20 million and a possible 2010 release.

“Rumor of ‘Footloose’ Remake”: Ace Showbiz.com

Cinema-sacrilege! Say it isn’t so!! How can they do this to one of the most cheese-tastic movies of all the 80’s? I have to do something…I…don’t…I…gotta…CUT LOOSE! FOOTLOOSE! Kick off my Sunday shoes…Geez…Louise…I have a feeling that this will not end well.

UPDATE: Just…no words man…just…go here…Doveman’s ‘Footloose’: The Lillywhite Session – or, cut and paste this address:

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=94718524

Scroll down to “Listen Now”, click it – it’s a podcast from Lillywhite Sessions. It is a taste of the remade soundtrack for the new “Footloose” movie. The new version of “Footloose” starts at 2:42.  My head exploded at 3:55, and frankly, I’m surprised I lasted that long.

Update 10AUG2010 – look at what I found…

(O_o  Clearly this is a joke.)

 

I take it back…I’ve got plenty of words, lol.  From this music it is to be assumed that Ren is a suicidal EMO timidly tip-toeing around campus as he seethingly whispers; “everybody cut! everybody cut!”

And “Dancing in the Sheets?” It’s great, except it might make you think you’ve ingested some kind of methamphetamine as you time-traveled back to the Beatles recording session of “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds.”

The only slightly luke warm spot is “Almost Paradise” and that’s not to say it’s even close to a passable remake. It’s so whinny…it’s like “Almost paradise but I decided to kill myself instead…please, please LOVE ME! I just need you to LOOOOOVE MEEEEE!” Far too desperate in all the wrong ways.  I mean, if Ren was desperate it was because he was trapped not because he was melodramatic! He needed to get out of that stinkin’ small town but he couldn’t so then he had to save that stinkin’ small town and HE DID! And good for him.

If this soundtrack is a harbinger of things to come, then we can fully expect Ren to be nothing more than a stripped down version of Pete Wentz whose biggest ambition is to silently whine and moan about how badly he wants to do something about something but he’s just so depressed that he can’t figure it out so he’ll just go write about his feelings instead of taking it out on an abandoned warehouse like a real man does.

The only way this thing might (and that is a really big “might”) be salvaged would be if Kevin Bacon assumed the role of Reverend Shaw Moore (Bacon makes everything better, right?  Maybe that’s just with food…though I have to admit, I think it’s true of movies too).  :D  Sadly, I have a sneaking suspicion that he won’t be going near this thing with 22 1/2′ pole.

So depressing.

Categories: Favorites, Movies

And you think you’re having a tough day…

February 26, 2009 1 comment

His inner turmoil is so acute and is evidence that Stains (yes, the dog’s name is Stains – no, not touchin’ that one)  has had to visualize something so distracting, so tantalizing that it keeps him from snatching not just one cupcake, but the entire plate of cupcakes…as well as the hand holding the plate.  If you look closely, you can see his nose flair slightly in resigned desperation.

What can be going through his mind…?  Honestly, I think Joel McHale sums it up best: “Stains went to his ‘special place’ visualizing a world where dogs are free to eat cupcakes and where savagely mauling crazy bitches with pony-tails would make him a hero instead of an outcast, emasculated and defeated on a shitty cable show.”

Carry on my brave little furry friend.  Be strong.

Edited to add: The HAPPY ENDING!! Way to go Stains! *applause*

Hypnodog.com

I need a blue-sky holiday…

February 18, 2009 3 comments

Heaven. *sigh*

Complete with a beach, an umbrella, and a ginormous fruity drink with a little umbrella all it’s own (as all beach drinks should have).

So, life is somewhat chaotic these days (isn’t it always).  However, I find that there is a kind of comfort associated with chaos…if you never know what’s coming then life is continually freaking the crap out of surprising you and that can bring with it all sorts of stress induced psychosis adventures! Like the one I had yesterday.   Seems like whenever anything is going too well, some giant shoe somewhere drops.  Maybe it’s cosmic law, or maybe it’s Murphy’s law…either way, I am screwed.  Just when I start to see the light at the end of the tunnel…I realize, that ain’t daylight- that’s the FREAKIN’ TRAIN-LIGHT!!! and Chaos steps in and mangles everything all up again.

Yesterday, I was driving along merrily on my way with my mom and my daughter (who had just suffered the horrors of vaccination and was therefore due her traditional shot-bribe, i.e. an ice cream sundae) when suddenly, and without warning (as I turned onto a major arterial) I found my car being  forced onto what little shoulder was available by a sudden loss of acceleration and the horrifying sound of grinding and snapping gears.    It sounded like an asphalt monster had come to life under my car and was chewing it’s way through my floorboards.

In a situation like this, the five stages of grief work in shotgun succession (in my case, within about 30 seconds):  *BOOM*Denial, in it’s most acute form–> ‘no…no, NO! NONONONO!!!” Then, *BOOM* Anger (works best while smashing something – example: I smashed my hand on the steering wheel. Repeatedly.) “ARGH!!!”. *BOOM* Bargaining.  “I promise I will never again torment telemarketers by pretending I am a) dead, b) 95 years old and just really glad to talk to someone or c) of foreign nationality, not able to understand a word they say if my car will just stop making these horrible noises and that maybe it’s only something like Godzilla-the-Twig caught in the undercarriage.  PLEASE!!!” *BOOM* Depression. “WHY DO THESE THINGS ALWAYS HAPPEN TO MEEEEEHEHEHEHE!!!”  *BOOM* Acceptance.  The car done broke…again.  *pout*

Realizing we were in fact sitting in a car barely pulled off the road in heavy 40mph traffic, we decided the non-death inviting thing to do would be to stand outside and away from my poor little wounded Volvo, call for a tow and wait.  What a nerve wracking experience that was…every time a car, truck, bus rounded the corner, I was sure my car was going to be smashed to pieces.  But what can one do?

Sure, I could have dissolved into a puddle of hysterical crying right there on the sidewalk because I was certain it was the transmission (i.e. $3,000 in repairs)…AGAIN!! but what good what that do and what kind of example what I be to my impressionable 13 year old?  So, I did the next best thing.  I lectured my daughter on why “this is exactly the reason I always tell you to bring a coat! and you never do and look at you!  you’re freezing because…blah,blah,blah”  I think it was all my mom could do to NOT wet herself laughing at me.  Good times.  Good times.

Just when I am sure the tow truck will never arrive…who should come to our rescue but a truck load of fire fighters. (*grin*)

Awesome Firefighters who rescued me!

They pulled up behind us, jumped down from their lofty fire truck seats and actually said, “Excuse me miss, what seems to be the trouble?”  Apparently they’re either western fans or Python fans…or both.  Either way, I’m in major good luck and I’m pretty sure I could have kissed them for calling me “miss” as I passed “miss” about *coughincomprehensiblecough*-years ago.  They proceeded to push my poor little car off the main street (where the tow truck did finally show up to take my car to the shop) and my very bad day suddenly got better.

And then, my husband arrived (to manage the tow guy of course) and took us all to lunch where we commiserated with each other about yet another vehicle repair and where he and I toasted each other over the fact that “6 more months baby!” And he’ll be done with school! I’m telling you it cannot come fast enough.  We didn’t even breath the silent thought between us –> “what else is gonna happen before then?” *ugh*

So it all breaks down to this:

Ben & Jerry’s post vaccination celebration sundae: $5.89

Drive axel replacement and alignment: $270.40

Firefighters are FULL of AWESOME!

For everything else, there’s xanax.

P.S.  Thank you mom for running along side our rescuers to catch them in action with your camera phone!  *grin*  Those boys could really move, couldn’t they!  LOL!

Categories: Favorites, Hilarity

Ani-whato?!?

February 5, 2009 Leave a comment

Animoto.  Also known, in the world of NLE (non-linear editing),  as CHEATING! LOL!

Example 1:  My daughter

Even though Animoto isn’t actually “video editing”, it is a rather clever tool and for someone who doesn’t know how to use NLE software, Animoto is a really wonderful automated video editing service.  However, as is true with all services, this one isn’t totally free.  The bait is free (the 30 second videos), full length videos are gonna cost ya.  $3 for one video or $30 for an all access pass for the year.

On the plus side: These took me about 5 minutes each to upload photos, choose music (available on their site and is available for free under Creative Commons licensing), and get the video mixed/edited.

The bad thing is: All your videos will look exactly the same…well, not look exactly the same, but they feel the same.  That is to say; they will be edited in exactly the same style.  It’s a cool style, excellent for professional photographers who want to offer a slideshow viewing for their clients, but for any serious video hobbyist – it will get old.  Fast. Also, stills only – no video clips allowed.  ;)  (UPDATE 30JUL2009:  Video clips are now allowed!!!)

Example 2:  Here’s my other girl

Example 3:  And here’s one of me

See what I mean?  Same editing style.  Gets old fast…though, one nice aspect of this service is; if you don’t like the first version…you can just “remix it”:

Remix!!

It’s great if you’re in a hurry.  Not so great if you want ANY creative control…but for the newbie, a very good thing to mess around with and for the advanced editor, an awesome tool for when you want to create-something-right-this-very-second, but just don’t have the time/energy/concentration to put forth the required effort. ;)

Categories: Cool Tools, Favorites